Lack of table manners could be deadly.

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I've heard it millions of times - chew your food properly. 20 times till you swallow? 40?  But instructions always lacked a convincing argumentation. Till now. Chew it properly or you might be dead.
Delicious but deadly mochi: The Japanese rice cakes that kill
http://www.bbc.com/news/world-asia-42537953

Two people have died in Japan and several are in a critical condition after choking on traditional rice cakes as part of the new year celebrations.

They may seem harmless, but each year the hard-to-eat snack claims several lives, prompting annual warnings from officials.

What is a mochi?

The cakes, known as mochi, are cute round buns made of soft and chewy rice.

The rice is first steamed and then pounded and mashed.

Image copyright AFP

Image caption Mochi-pounding at a shrine in Tokyo

The resulting sticky rice mass is then formed into the final mochi shape and baked or boiled.

Families traditionally celebrate New Year by cooking a vegetable broth in which they heat the mochi.

How do they kill?

The buns are chewy and sticky. Given they are far bigger than bite-sized, they need to be laboriously chewed before swallowing.

Anyone who can't chew properly - like children, or the elderly - will be likely to find them hard to eat.

Image copyright AFP

Image caption If you can't chew them, please cut them, emergency services urge

If not chewed but simply swallowed, the sticky mochi gets stuck in the throat - and can lead to suffocation.

According to Japanese media, 90% of those rushed to hospital from choking on their new year's dish are people aged 65 or older.

What's a safe way to eat them?

Chew, chew, chew. If that's not possible, the rice cakes need to be cut into smaller pieces.

Each year, authorities issue public warnings in the run-up to the new year festivities advising that people - especially the very young and elderly - should only eat mochi cut down to smaller little chunks.

Yet despite the warnings, each year there continue to be deaths linked to the dish.

At the turn of 2014 to 2015, the number of casualties peaked at nine. In 2016 it was one, while last year two people died.

Each year, many more end up in critical condition in hospitals across the country.

Surpassing Leo Burnett. An open letter to Kindle.

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Dear Kindle,
Leo Burnett once said "We want consumers to say, 'That's a hell of a product' instead of, 'That's a hell of an ad.'"
He didn't even think of an ad when consumers would be saying: "What the hell?"

Well done, Kindle. Let me congratulate you with a new approach to advertising "Are you in or are you out?" by Tanya Kosh. It might be not necessarily the book the poor Kindle reader would ever buy. But clearly the one which would be hard to forget.

Quality-Fast

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Continuing the topic of fast food.

In-depth interviews are the best method to get to the heart of the matter. They are long, they are expensive, they are hard to conduct sometimes. Especially if the incentive you offer to the respondent is to buy them lunch. Not the best choice, I agree. How can you ask your questions with a mouth full? How can you understand the answer if the person opposite the table is trying to combine the process of being interviewed with claiming his incentive? But depending on the topic, this could be your best choice ever. And how else can you get an opinion from a hard working young men (apparently the most underrepresented group in any research).

"Hi, Ben," - I say. "can I invite you for lunch? Need to ask a couple of questions for my forthcoming book".
Ben is young, smart and busy.
"Of course," - he says. (I am his mother's friend. Recruitment is easy). "But I have a rather short lunch break. Shall we go for some quality-fast ?"

There is even a Facebook page called "Quality-Fast". Or should I say was? (translation on the picture below is provided by Facebook itself).

Ben is still to select his quality-fast (good food with blitz-service).

But I have some findings already: Quality-Fast is useful. Not easy to find, at least in the viscinity of Ben's office. Doesn't work in French (see the Facebook screenshot above). 

Fast Food with Imperial Touch.

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Celebrities do help to sell. Quite a few years ago I talked to the editor-in-chief of one of the many glossies about writing columns. She said that the rules are simple - a bit about celebrities, a bit about yourself, something useful for the reader [to learn], something funny to laugh about, something glamorous to enjoy [and somehow to relate to]. And don't forget the loop - finish with the reference to what you started with. What she forgot to mention was, in my book, the most important rule - a strong opinion. And that's what I have today. I strongly believe that  boiled beef in Plachutta, " a synonym for Viennese cuisine" (their own rather humble statement) is nothing else but fast food. A glamorous version of it with several outlets in Vienna.

Yes, it takes a while to boil beef. But if you put it on the hob in the morning, it is ready by lunch time. You don't even have to do much. Add some vegetables to bones and meat, roast them slightly before putting into the pot with water. Add herbs, salt, pepper to the pot, stir and remove the froth when it boils (or strain it) for clarity. This is nearly it. And then simmer and simmer and simmer... for a very long time.  The later you order your lunch there, the softer the meat. Tried and tested. Dinner's beef is impeccable. It melts in the mouth.

Boiled beef and accessories (e.g., potatoes and spinach) concept is simple. It is the same recipe cooked for years. It nears perfection. No extra movements, no frills, no extras, no need for special staff training. And it shows. Meat (they call it "tafelspitz") is served within five minutes of ordering. More difficult with drinks - the lack of training shows. The young, friendly and by the end of the evening slightly embarrassed waiters (all men. No women - this is, I believe, another part of the concept) come to our table at least five times with other people drinks.

Boiled beef concept is clearly cost efficient. Guaranteed volumes and consistency of orders are clearly reciprocated by discounted prices of suppliers. The relationships are long-standing and rather close. Plachutta claims they can trace each cow they boil to its birth. It remains unknown if the employees have to visit the calves and bring them carrots. Or whatever alpine cows consider to be a treat.  Possibly not, as it would add to the cost. Prices in Plachutta are high for fast food, but reasonable for a tourist trap.

Boiled beef is a status food. Lunch time choice for business meetings in the centre of Vienna. You have to book well in advance. You don't expect the favourite dish of the Austrian Emperor to be readily available at a short notice, do you? Even if takes no time at all to get it to you when you are at the table.

Boiled beef is a powerful concept. Emperor's favourite food doesn't leave much room to anything else. Pudding (desert) is obviously a poor relative whose name  no one knows. How otherwise you can order soufflé and be presented with something remotely resembling Victoria Sponge with some custard filling?

How it works/ the table manners for long-boiled beef (do not read if even the thought of offal makes you sick):

How it looks:

fast food noun uk ​ /ˌfɑːst ˈfuːd/ us ​ /ˌfæst ˈfuːd/

​

 Hot food such as hamburgers that is quick to cook or is already cooked and is therefore served very quickly in a restaurant

Celebrities help to sell. Royalties - even more so. Apparently, some food flies off the shelves due to Prince George. His school lunch menu has been published recently.

I am waiting for Plachutta's drive-through openings, though I am a bit wondering whether it would be only Bentleys and Porsches allowed to get a take-away. OK, and horse-driven carriages. There are plenty of those in Vienna.

Fast food is food. Fine if you want it fast. But it remains what it is - fast food. Even if there is an imperial touch to it.

Oktoberfest starts in September.

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In fact, as early as the day after tomorrow. It starts on the 16th of September, this coming Saturday.

Table manners constitute an important part of cultural competence whether you travel on business or for pleasure. Or host people from other countries in your hometown. A trifle, like how you like your beer served can leave you out, preventing you from joining in and enjoying the fun.

Say you are English and go to Oktoberfest in Munich. You like beer; it is your drink of choice. You anticipate your first mass (beer mug 1, holds 1 litre). You know how you like your beer to look, how you like it to taste. And here it comes. With a beer head a third of a mug tall. That’s how they do it in Germany. Beer should have a head. Even if you serve it at home.

Many English friends and colleagues of mine felt puzzled. Andrew even asked the waiter directly “and where is one-third of my beer?” He felt cheated. Paid for a whole litre and got two-thirds of it.

Germans coming to England and getting their pints full, clean and clear are known for asking publicans not “to kill the best there.”[i]

A colleague of mine, Karsten, sporting a rather depressed face after his first pint served “according to the local” standards at Highgate pub, which he insisted was frequented by Karl Marx, went as far as getting beyond the bar and grabbing the bartender’s hand in order to ensure he gets his beer the way he likes it. Karl Marx, still in Highgate, just a few hundred meters away down the hill, surely approved.[ii] The bartender wasn’t amused.

According to Euromonitor International data, reported by Telegraph.co.uk (Akkoc, 2014), Germany consumes an estimated 110 litres of beer per person totalling nearly 9bn litres per year in total. UK – only half of the total amount, 4.3bn litres, which translates into 67 litres per capita. Maybe beer with the head really knows better when it comes to sales?

Differences in how you serve alcohol are not limited to beer only. The British “large glass” of wine doesn’t exist in Austria. Serve it and you would be considered a low class alcoholic. You can order a “viertel” (quarter, the same 250 ml<) but it will be served in the jug and the waiter will pour only something like 125 or even less in your glass.

---

[i] You can read more on how to pour different beer German style here: http://www.businessinsider.com/how-to-pour-beer-like-a-german-2015-8?IR=T

[ii] Karl Marx is buried in Highgate Cemetery East. He moved to London in 1849 and died there in 1883.

"Are You in or Are You Out? Inclusivity and Exclusivity of Table Manners: A light-hearted journey into a rather serious matter" by Tanya Kosh (How to Eat: All around Table Manners Book 1)

The table manners of pets.

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Somewhere in Austria, in the middle of nowhere there is a lovely restaurant with a beautiful outside area. Cows on the hill, something like 5 meters away do not bother neither visitors, nor the owners. But dogs do. They inspired the owner to add a little poem to his menu saying, basically, that he doesn't mind having the dogs in the restaurant sitting on the chairs or benches as long as they have table manners. And use the cutlery.
The table manners of dogs are universal concern. And teaching dogs and the restaurant staff good table manners up to the level of certificate is no joke.  Say, for example, Venice.

According to mysuncoast.com the following regulation is in place:
In order to protect the health, safety and general welfare of the public, a restaurant is prohibited from having any dog on its premises unless it possesses a valid city permit for Dog Friendly Dining. All permits issued are subject to the following requirements, according to the city code:
•    All restaurant employees shall wash their hands promptly after petting or otherwise handling any dog. Employees shall be prohibited petting or otherwise handling any dog while serving food or beverages, or handling tableware or before entering other parts of the restaurant.
•    Patrons in a designated outdoor area shall be advised that they should wash their hands before eating. Waterless hand sanitizers shall be provided at all tables there.
•    Employees and patrons shall be instructed that they shall not allow dogs to come into contact with tabletops, serving dishes, utensils, tableware, linens, paper products, or any other items involved in food service operations.
•    Dogs shall not be allowed to eat any food.
•    Patrons shall keep their dogs on a leash at all times and keep their pets under reasonable control.
•    Dogs shall not be allowed on chairs, tables or other furnishings.
•    All table and chair surfaces shall be cleaned and sanitized with an approved product between seating of patrons. Spilled food and drink shall be removed from the floor or ground between seatings as well.

•    Accidents involving dog waste shall be cleaned immediately and the area sanitized with an approved product. A kit with the appropriate materials for this purpose shall be kept near the designated outdoor area.
•    At least one sign reminding employees of Doggy Dining rules shall be posted in a conspicuous location frequented by employees within the restaurant.
•    At least one sign reminding patrons of the rules shall be posted in a conspicuous location within the designated outdoor area.
•    At all times while the designated outdoor section of the restaurant is available to patrons and their dogs, at least one sign shall be posted in a conspicuous and public location near the entrance to the designated outdoor area, to place patrons on notice that the section is currently available to patrons accompanied by their dog.
•    Dogs shall not be permitted to travel through indoor or undesignated outdoor portions of the restaurant, and ingress and egress to the designated outdoor area shall not require entrance into or passage through any indoor or undesignated outdoor portion of the eatery.
•    All restaurants participating in the Dog Friendly Dining program shall provide and maintain a drinking water station for patrons' dogs and dogs in general.
Anyone at a restaurant observing these rules being broken – such as dogs on patrons' laps or eating food at the table, or servers not washing their hands after petting a dog – should contact the city Code Enforcement Department by calling 941-486-2626.

It should be summer...

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... Alpacas next door have been shaved.